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Directions
hippeastrum
rix_scaedu
This is my response to Day 4 of http://aldersprig.livejournal.com/'s 30 Days of Flash Fiction, the list for which can be found at http://aldersprig.livejournal.com/221684.html?view=1245940#t1245940

You can’t miss it, she said. Well, you can if the person giving you directions starts by turning you off up the wrong street. Turn up the street after the school she said when she meant the road before the school.

You don’t go past another school, she said when I was trying to check that I knew where she was talking about. Yes you do, the public one. Has she never noticed?

Then you turn up a side street after the place we went for the concert that time. It’s a back street, suburban four way intersection with a major driveway coming into it. Not only wasn’t it sign posted but the street name she gave me for there was back at the first turn – the road’s changed its name since then.

Interesting clientele you have here. Is the minotaur a regular? Can’t say I blame him, this vegetarian chilli is really good.

Up the back of the retirement village she said. Let me tell you, that retirement village is the size of a small suburb all by itself: Assisted Living; Independent Living; internal street names; and their own internal bus stops. Then when you find the nursing home it’s called the Aged Care Facility, of course she didn’t tell me that. We were nearly on a fire trail going over the ridge.

Yes, I got where I was going that time but I still can’t get her to draw a map. I’d better settle up and get going I suppose. Lemonade and a beer to go, please? Oh, the lemonade’s for me - I’m driving. The beer’s for the road. I’m going to need all the help I can get if I’m going to find my way home from here.

I don’t suppose you sell road maps?

 



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To be fair to my mother, this slightly exaggerates the problems I had yesterday following her directions to the nursing home my grandfather has just had to move into. Almost ending up on the fire access track was probably my fault.

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